i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
