Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
