don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize