I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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