absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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