I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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