the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
We are two peas in an std pod
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize
