I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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