Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
