The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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