All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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