You don't have asthma, your pregnant
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
