Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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