the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
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So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
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Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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