so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I need a hoe opinion
go on
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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