I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
