it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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