Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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