I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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