we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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