on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
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