She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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