i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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