had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
