Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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