i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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