I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
