New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
