if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
