You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
