do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
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