his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Randomize
