What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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