Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
