so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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