I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
whose parrot is this?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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