yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Everything about him screamed your future.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize