she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
