Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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