You work out of a Hotel?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
