OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
