did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
So much rum. So many feels.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
