My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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