yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
