He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
