My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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