Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
