All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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