the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Randomize
