im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
