So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize